“They also gave me gall for my food, And for my thirst they gave me vinegar to drink.” Psalms 69:21 NKJV
Reflection: is it possible to get so close to God that we can hear and know His heart?
It can be a bit scary when someone so close to you, like a spouse or a good friend, say something out loud that you are thinking. An emotion or an idea that you have never expressed in words, but somehow your spouse or friend knows exactly what is going on in your heart. They can sense it, because they know you. And you might find yourself saying,
“How did you know that?”
To get that close to someone takes time. Takes engagement and willingness to listen to each other. To learn about each other, the good and the not so good. Our dreams, victories, struggles and defeats. All of it is necessary to get to know another person that intimate.
Some never get that close to anyone else, which is probably for a number of reasons. But most likely from insecurities, keeping others at a “safe distance”. Not wanting to share the truth about who they really are, especially when it comes to their struggles and defeats. So they create an external facade and deflect anything that could expose negative things, anything coming too close to the truth. Their hearts are well protected; at least so they think. But the sad thing is that, without sharing the real heart, those people will never experience the fullness of an authentic relationship.
Psalm 69 exposes an amazing truth to us about the relationship between David and God. In the psalm, you will find at least two direct connections, prophecies, describing what happened about 1000 years later to Jesus. The first “For zeal for your house has consumed me, and the reproaches of those who reproach you have fallen on me.” Psalm 69:9 ESV. This was describing Jesus heart and behavior when he drove the money changers out from the temple before Passover. We read from John “And he told those who sold the pigeons, “Take these things away; do not make my Father’s house a house of trade.” His disciples remembered that it was written, “Zeal for your house will consume me.””John 2:16-17 ESV
The second is from the crucifixion, as Jesus is hanging on the cross. “They also gave me gall for my food, And for my thirst they gave me vinegar to drink.” Psalms 69:21 NKJV. We read from John “After this, Jesus, knowing that all things were now accomplished, that the Scripture might be fulfilled, said, “I thirst!” Now a vessel full of sour wine was sitting there; and they filled a sponge with sour wine, put it on hyssop, and put it to His mouth.” John 19:28-29 NKJV. So the question is, how was David able to “see” this, to hear this, 1000 years before it happened?
When reading the rest of this psalm, you see David pouring out his heart before God. He is not holding anything back. He is real. He is raw. With his emotions. With is situation of struggles and failures. And I believe God honors this, a truthful heart. We see this in many other psalms of David, such as in psalms 139 where he ends famously “Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me, and know my anxieties; And see if there is any wicked way in me, And lead me in the way everlasting.” Psalms 139:23-24 NKJV.
I believe David got so close to the Lord that he could sense, he could feel His heart. And was able to even echo what Jesus would be experiencing 1000 years later, as it was in the heart of God already then. And there is such a beautiful lesson here for us today, whether we are seeking to get so close to the Lord that we too can know His heart. It means that we need to expose ourselves fully to the Lord. No facades. And maybe we too, like David, can echo thoughts from the Lord to those around us.