Love Is – Is Not

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant” 1 Corinthians 13:4 ESV

Reflection: what is the difference between describing what something is, versus what it is not?

We looked yesterday at some of the characteristics of Jesus, described by Paul in 1. Corinthians 13. This is such an important thing for us to reflect on, so we will look at this from another perspective. For those who love math, you might remember the idea of inclusion and exclusion within a set. A key thing to understand is that, if something is included in a set, it cannot also be excluded. And visa versa is also true. But whether you are into math or not, we all get the idea of inclusion and exclusion. You might have heard this described inclusion as “is”, and exclusion as “is not”; it is just a simpler way to describe the same idea. And, it is sometimes necessary to use both terms to describe something, to make it clear. Ok, are you bored yet? 

Stay with me, because Paul is using this exact idea to describe “love”. Let’s read Paul’s description again, and try to pick out what love is (included), versus what it is not (excluded). “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 ESV. 

What love “Is”:

  • Patient
  • Kind
  • Rejoice in truth
  • Bears all things
  • Believes all things 
  • Hopes all things 
  • Endures all things 
  • Never ends 

What love “is not”: 

  • Envious 
  • Boastful 
  • Arrogant 
  • Rude
  • Insist on its own way
  • Irritable 
  • Resentful 
  • Rejoice in wrongdoing 

As you see, there are 8 characteristics of what love is, and also 8 for what it is not, which is interesting in itself. When you see this list, a few questions probably come to your mind. First, why in the world did Paul see the need to also include what love is not? Shouldn’t that be obvious to most people? When we have received Christ, and believe in his name (John 1:12), we have been born again by God (John 1:13). We are existing in two ways; old self, and a new creation in Christ. The “what love is” list is characterizing our new, born again creation; while the “what love is not” list is the old self. Our flesh. 

As we are being more and more transformed in Christ, as we consume the “living word” and let Jesus become a bigger and bigger part of us, we will behave like that first list. Paul writes about this on several occasions. “We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin.” Romans 6:6 ESV. “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” 2 Corinthians 5:17 ESV. “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” Galatians 2:20 ESV

Old self versus a new creation in Christ. Who is dominating you? Do you have room for Christ, or is the old self still in control?

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